1. Grindr
- Strengths: Still the most widely-used gay dating app, available in around 190 countries with about 14.5 million users. Its location-based format enables fast, local connections, and features like “Tribes” allow users to explore common interests.
- Weaknesses: Despite new features for relationship-focused intentions, it maintains a strong hookup reputation. Privacy and harassment remain concerns for many.
- What People Say: Reddit users note its unmistakeable reach (“huge user base”) and simplicity, but criticize its hookup-first culture, outdated interface, and safety issues.
2. Scruff
- Strengths: Touted as Grindr’s more mature and community-driven counterpart, Scruff appeals to bear, cub, and leather communities. It offers detailed profiles and richer communication features
- Weaknesses: It has a smaller user base and some find the interface less intuitive or outdated.
- What People Say: Users praise its thoughtful community vibe and customization, saying it attracts more relationship-minded individuals than Grindr.
App Dating vs. In‑Person Dating
From App Experiences
- Pros:
- Accessibility & reach: Apps open doors to more potential connections, especially in areas lacking queer circles.
- Customization & control: Many apps let you filter based on your dating goals, interests, and identity.
- Convenience: You can meet people from anywhere, anytime.
- Cons:
- Superficiality & choice overload: Endless swiping may reduce matches to physical attraction and fuel dissatisfaction.
- Privacy & safety concerns: Instances of harassment, catfishing, and data issues persist.
- Mental health effects: The addictive nature can foster anxiety, rejection sensitivity, and emotional burnout.
In-Person Dating Still Exists—And Matters
- Growing desire for real connections: Many Gen Z and millennials are backing away from apps in favor of clubs, classes, hobby groups, speed dating, and IRL meetups.
- Studies mixed, but real bonds matter:
- One study found relationships that began via apps are just as strong in satisfaction as those that started in person.
- Conversely, recent research suggests offline couples feel more understood, passionate, and lasting; in contrast to online couples who face less long-term commitment.
- Challenges of in-person dating: Many singles feel awkward navigating IRL romantic initiation, especially post-pandemic — unsure how to approach people, when, and where.
So, Does In‑Person Dating Still Exist Today?
Absolutely. Though apps dominate as the most convenient option, there’s an unmistakable shift—especially among younger people—back toward authentic, face-to-face connections. In-person events are gaining traction, but social norms and uncertainty around direct romantic approaches continue to be hurdles.
Summary Table
Mode | Pros | Cons |
---|---|---|
Grindr | Largest reach, fast connections, new filters | Hookup reputation, privacy/safety issues |
Scruff | Community vibe, rich profiles | Smaller base, less polished UI |
App Dating (general) | Accessible, customizable, widely available | Surface-level interactions, mental health risks |
In-Person Dating | Authentic connections, deeper bonds | Social awkwardness, new-found challenges in approach |
In essence, Grindr remains the go-to for broad access and quick matches, while Scruff offers a more thoughtful community environment. Meanwhile, dating in person is far from obsolete—it’s resurging as a meaningful alternative, especially for those craving deeper connection beyond swipes and chats.